Survivor Guilt takes a softer turn for an event curated by Gem Rosenberg at Cult Party in Bushwick, Brooklyn.

Every day all but a few Americans are faced with an onslaught of war, terror, attacks on other countries, threats to their healthcare, and police brutality to name a few. Scrolling through your social media you could, without trying, see a video of a man getting murdered in cold blood by the very people meant to protect you. In the face of all this violence and fear, we still somehow manage to go to work, to have hobbies, and do things for fun. The most stark example of this is the American addiction to consumerism and shopping. When stressed out we may spend hours on Amazon looking for the right dress, or binge watch an entire twelve season series - an idea that did not even exist ten years ago. We love to loose ourselves in action movies with a hero to save us all, one good guy who will turn things around. But, we are scared to be the good guy ourselves - or we can't afford to. 

Sometimes, we cannot hold it together. We cry when mass shootings happen, or cry over nothing and wonder what's wrong. We have panic attacks and are not sure why. Our mental health problems increase every day and we don't have the resources to deal with it. 

In this iteration of Survivor Guilt, I attempt to make a shield of roses, a plant known for its boundary setting and fortifying properties. But like everything else we try, the roses peel apart and come off just the same, leaving me exposed, vulnerable, and panting.